Funny Children Quotes |
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~ Children are all foreigners. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
~ Familiarity breeds contempt, and children.~ Mark Twain ~ A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~ Raising children is like chewing on a stone.~ Arab Proverb ~ Insanity is hereditary, you get it from your kids. ~ Sam Levenson ~ Never have more children than you have car windows. ~ Erma Bombeck ~ A lot of parents pack up their troubles and send them off to summer camp. ~ Raymond Duncan ~ Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age. ~ William Feather ~ If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. ~ Robert Brault ~ Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too. ~ Lionel Kauffman ~ Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for. ~ Ogden Nash ~ If your parents didn't have any children, there's a good chance that you won't have any. ~ Clarence Day ~ Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed. ~ Robert Gallagher ~ Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky. ~ Fran Lebowitz ~ Children always assume the sexual lives of their parents come to a grinding halt at their conception. ~ Alan Bennett ~ There are only two things a child will share willingly, communicable diseases and his mother's age. ~ Benjamin Spock ~ Your children vividly remember every unkind thing you ever did to them, plus a few you really didn't. ~ Mignon McLaughlin ~ When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. ~ Erma Bombeck ~ Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. ~ P.J. O'Rourke ~ I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: "Checkout Time is 18 years." ~ Erma Bombeck ~ All of us have moments in out lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them. ~ Erma Bombeck ~ If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. ~ Edgar W. Howe ~ A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm. ~ Bill Vaughan ~ Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you. ~ Erma Bombeck ~ If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says "keep away from children." ~ Susan Savannah ~ Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective. ~ P. J. O'Rourke |
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